Peace on Earth; Good Will toward Men

It feels so close, I can almost touch it.











By dinner time on Christmas Eve, my two sons will be home, and with the rest of the family we'll gather round the table and eat dinner as a family. I'll try to make a toast--to us, to life, to happiness--but I'm sure my voice will catch in my throat, my eyes will fill, my younger son will laugh, my older son will smile, and my husband will finish the toast for me.

We're incredibly lucky and I know it.

Not that it's been an easy year, but it's been another year in our lives and that counts the most.

I spent Monday baking cookies and chex mix, finalizing my grocery lists, wrapping the last few presents, and thinking back on Christmases past.











This afternoon, I'll bake several batches of Christmas cut-out cookies, wrap the stocking stuffers, and settle down by the fire and read for awhile. Tomorrow, I'll worry until one old jeep pulls into the driveway and one airplane arrives from Seattle.



Then, all I'll have to do is enjoy having all of us under the same roof for a few days.

And we'll make memories that will carry me through until the next time.

And that's what I wish for all of you--warmth, family, memories. Sweet times. Hold tight to all of them.

All the best for 2010.

Holiday and New Year Musings

It's bitterly cold here in St. Louis today. My husband is at the mall (only 3 shopping days left!), one of my sons is at the Rams game with college buddies, and I'm about to go make another batch of cookies. The crockpot is filled with the makings for White Chicken Chili, and in a few hours friends are coming over to enjoy the chili and cookies and some holiday cheer.

I moved to this town and this house 18 years ago next month, and the two families coming over tonight are the first people I met. They are, literally, my next-door neighbor and back-fence neighbor. At the time, our kids were toddlers. The three youngest of those kids will be joining us tonight, all home from college. It'll be the first party where none of them will have to sneak a beer in the backyard.

Over the years we've worried about teachers and mean kids at school and college acceptances. We've driven carpools, and babysat. We've mourned the loss of parents and buried beloved pets. We've welcomed new puppies and one grandbaby. We all danced at my wedding 3 years ago. We've borrowed eggs and traded recipes and sat up way too late drinking wine. We've brought meals after surgery and driven each other home after medical procedures. We've had health scares and put out one driveway fire.

We try to get together more often, but life gets in the way and we find ourselves running into each other at the grocery store and saying things like "we've got to get together" and we wave from the driveway or holler over the back fence. So, it's a treat to actually have a date on the calendar when we can relax and laugh and reminisce.

And that's one of the wonderful things about this time of year. For one, my house is all decorated and cozy so I want to light the candles and have friends over. For another, it's a time to look back and look forward, and that naturally means thinking about good friends.



When I moved here, so much ahead of me was unknown. Divorce, remarriage. A first novel being published. Teaching full-time and then changing careers. In the past year, even, our three families have weathered sadnesses and celebrations like families all over the world. And I love looking back at the quilt of our lives, pieces here and there of all the things that have made us who we are, woven together in tears and laughter and love.

Who knows what we'll be celebrating at the end of 2009?

But to all of you, I wish you a holiday filled with warmth and laughter and family and good friends. And a 2009 full of joy and surprise and adventure.

See you next year.

Adventures in Wrapping

Today it was cold and icy outside. I chose to stay inside where it was toasty and cozy.

I baked cookies and made chili and wrapped presents which will soon be under the tree (as soon as we put it up).

I love this time of preparation and waiting.

I unpacked all the Christmas decorations yesterday. The day before I started (and came darn close to finishing) our Christmas shopping. Hence the need for gift-wrapping today.

I had a great time this afternoon. The aroma of freshly baked cookies hung in the air, I filled the CD player with Christmas carols (I just love this David Bowie/Bing Crosby rendition of "Little Drummer Boy"), and I sat at the dining room table and wrapped presents.

And you know what?

BOOKS ARE THE PERFECT GIFT!!!

They are much easier to wrap than anything else. I mean, Macy's rocks, but their boxes are flimsy. And rarely does the item fit as neatly inside as I'd like it to. And then there are the items that don't fit neatly into boxes. So creative taping becomes important. But, books. Oh my. Even my dog could wrap books (and he doesn't have opposable thumbs). And, if you're like me and have to mail some gifts, well, can I just mention that they're a cinch to mail? Okay, I mentioned it.

I've got a slew of books on my wish list. And at least 5 of the folks on my list (and we're cutting way back this year) are going to be the lucky recipients of books.

So, if you're still looking for that perfect gift, wander into your local bookstore and buy bunches.

Think Fearlessly, Act Locally

So, I spent last week putting the final touches on my MS. Today I'll read it through one last time, tweak a few things here and there, rewrite the synopsis, and send it off to my agent. Yes, I'm well aware that all the news in publishing (and the auto industry and Wall Street, and . . . . ) is bleak. I believe a week ago we had "Black Wednesday." To some, I suppose, it would seem silly at best and utterly pointless/stupid/bang-your-head-against-the-wall frustrating to be sending off a MS in the hopes it'll be published. But, read this journal entry written by my dear, wise author friend Bev Marshall. She gets to the heart of why we write.

In working on this last revision/rewrite I discovered that I was writing fearlessly. Okay, the market might have cratered, but that didn't mean I should give up on my characters. I'm not writing for some vague "market" anyway. I'm writing to tell a story, an important story. I'm writing because it's who I am and what I do. And so my words soared out onto the computer screen. Nobody's buying? Okay, then, even more reason to write from the heart.

And as I went about the rest of my week, I thought how freeing it was to write without fear. And it extended beyond just writing. So, the economy is terrifying? That gave me the freedom to scale back on my holiday buying, but it also meant that I wanted to make what I give count all the more. Distill it down, so to speak. Rather than 6 or 7 wrapped presents under the tree, what are three things that will tell my son I really know him?

And what can I do for the booksellers who've helped me so much? I can get off my couch and go buy my books from them rather than adding to "my cart" with a click of the mouse. And lots of those great indies have web presences, too.

Here are two of my local stores who will get my business:

The fabulous Main Street Books in St. Charles, owned by the wonderful Vicki Erwin

And the classic Left Bank Books in the Central West End (and now also in downtown St. Louis. Yes, they just oepend a new store this fall. You gotta love that!)

Two other indie stores that have treated me (and gobs of other authors well!) are Schwartz's in Milwaukee and The Garden District Book Shop in New Orleans.

Feel free to share your favorite indie store when you leave a comment. And this holiday season, don't let the bad news hold you back.

Fearless. That's my new motto.

Love and Joy Come to You . . .

I love Christmas, in all its chaos and stress and emotional upheaval. I love the memories and the hopes for the future and seeing little kids giddy with excitement. I love the smell of freshly baked cookies, and the fir tree in my house, and finding my cat snuggled under it among all the presents. I love findng the right gift for the right person and still being able to surprise my twenty-something sons. I love that, through the wonder of stepdaughters, I now have girls to buy gifts for.

I love dropping a five or ten in the red Salvation Army kettle, and I love Christmas carols--the traditional ones and the more modern ones. I love that twice I've heard Springsteen sing "Santa Claus is Comin' to Town" live in concert. I love the goofy coffee and hallmark and beer commercials that make me cry.

I love the sense of hope and wonder and miracles that this time of year holds--that even when it's gray and wet and cold outside, there's this spirit of love and faith and mystery in the air.

I wish all of you a warm, wonderful holiday season filled with laughter and time for quiet and good food and being with people you love.